Staying Alive

I’ve been reading and listening to the work Dan Sullivan quite a lot, lately. Dan is the founder of Strategic Coach, a popular coaching program for entrepreneurs. In this podcast episode that I listened to this past week, Dan suggested something that had never occurred to me before: He believes that being surrounded by younger, highly-engaged entrepreneurs is slowing his own aging relative to his octogenarian peers.

This is the psychological equivalent (in my mind) of the fact that exposing our bodies to certain types of physical stress promotes higher levels of bone density. I would not be surprised if Dan’s theory some day is validated by scientific research.

At the age of 81, Dan is more than halfway to his stated goal of living to the age of 156. I don’t know how he chose this goal, but it’s obviously ambitious. The nature of his work keeps him surrounded by 30- to 50- year old entrepreneurs, and he thinks this has made a difference in both his mental outlook and his own biology.

I remember my mother warning me during my teenage years to avoid spending time with certain peers - that they would be a bad influence on me. With the benefit of hindsight, she was clearly right. What Dan suggests is that hanging out with older people who have disengaged from life in certain ways could be a biological detriment to anyone seeking to maximize both lifespan and health span.

Could it be that achieving some level of financial freedom accelerates our own demise? That shutting down our hustle, coasting through a life of ease sends a message to our cells that “Hey, this person no longer needs to thrive.” Related to this I think are the many anecdotes we hear of elderly people who care for ailing spouses, only to decline rapidly themselves once relieved of the challenges of caregiving. We somehow rise to the challenges that surround us (to some degree).

This little nugget of an idea is going to stick with me, I think. I’m going to stay goal-oriented, engaged and seeking variety rather than monotony for the foreseeable future.

I don’t expect to live forever, but I do expect to live a lot.

Sunday Supper

Lori and I enjoyed this simple one-pot Miso-Turmeric Salmon and Coconut Rice this past week. This unique way of preparing Lemonade has caught my eye. It reminds me of a drink an Indian friend once prepared for me that was surprisingly refreshing. This Spring Salad looks great, too.

Sunday Music

The Buena Vista Social Club brought their amazing Cuban sound to the NPR Tiny Desk recently. And here is Snarky Puppy, live at North Sea Jazz, 2023. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  You can do anything you set your mind to. Let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Might Ain’t Right

First, an administrative note: This site (my personal website, primarily the home of my weekly essays) has been moved to www.nealbell.net. I have now launched a website at www.nealbell.com in support of my EOS Implementer practice. I recognize that this only makes it harder to find my personal essays, but it made the most sense.

Lately, writing my weekly essays has become more difficult. This is partially due to the shrinking amount of time and energy I am able to devote to this weekly practice. For me, writing these essays is the best way for me to make sense of life as it plays out. I share my thoughts broadly, primarily so that just two people can access them, should they ever wish to do so (my offspring). Having a weekly deadline puts me “on the hook” to make an entry into this weekly journal, and I think it is good for me.

A second reason that writing has become more difficult is because the things that have most been on my mind are things that I really didn’t want to focus on, or share publicly due to the inherent polarizing nature of the topics.

But it is 7:10am this Sunday, and my self-imposed deadline to publish is 8:30am, and the issue occupying my mind is what it is.

Eighty-three weeks ago, I wrote a post titled Remote Control Bullying. In it, I talked about the concept of stochastic terrorism, which is defined as “a form of political violence instigated by hostile public rhetoric directed at a group or an individual. Unlike incitement to terrorism, stochastic terrorism is accomplished with indirect, vague or coded language, which grants the instigator plausible deniability for any associated violence.” That essay from 83 weeks ago cited three specific examples of stochastic terrorism that were playing out across America: voter intimidation at poll sites, the storming of the Capitol building on January 6th, 2021, and the foiled plot by 14 people to kidnap Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer.

Since being re-elected to the American Presidency, Donald Trump has taken two actions with regard to the items I wrote about 83 weeks ago. On the first day of his recently-won 2nd term, he pardoned more than 1,500 people convicted of offenses related to the storming of the Capitol on January 6th, 2021. More recently, Trump’s Department of Justice agreed to pay the family of January 6th rioter Ashli Babbitt almost $5 million to settle a wrongful death lawsuit. And in this week’s news cycle, recently-appointed DOJ attorney Ed Martin Jr. said that he is going to take a "hard look" at two men who are serving long prison terms for leading a conspiracy to kidnap Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer.

The message is clear: Violence committed in support of things that Donald Trump views as positive are no longer illegal. Commit violence on his behalf, then patiently wait in jail for your pardon. If you are killed while committing these acts, your surviving family will be financially compensated.

Donald Trump is America’s President, and the power to pardon people resides with that office. So all of this is perfectly legal. But we should ask ourselves, eighty three weeks since I last addressed this topic, whether this type of “leadership” is going to inspire more violence.

I wish this wasn’t what was on my mind this morning. But there it is. This Memorial Day weekend, as we mourn the loss of our U.S. servicemen and women, I reflect on their sacrifice and this ongoing abuse of leadership.

Sunday Supper

We are enjoying some Korean flavors this weekend. Give this Grilled Gochujang Pork With Fresh Sesame Kimchi a try. These Spicy Cucumbers With Mint, Scallions and Crushed Peanuts are a perfect compliment. And keep the spice rolling with these Gochujang Caramel Cookies.

Sunday Music

I can think of no one better to listen to this Memorial Day than one of America’s greatest musical storytellers, Mr. Bruce Springsteen. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  You can do anything you set your mind to.  Let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Commencement Speech

This weekend was graduation day for many colleges and universities. Yesterday Lori and I made a brief appearance at the grad party of a young man who was in our younger son’s graduating class in high school.

As I was getting cleaned up and dressed for the evening, a simple sentence came into my head to share with the young man when I saw him: “You never have to grow up, but you must always keep learning.” Reflecting on this statement, it does seem to cover a lot of ground.

Looking back to my own graduation, I do recall some degree of dread around entering “the real world.” This meant taking on a certain amount of drudgery, of being geographically separated from my college friends, paying bills, performing tasks at work that were basic, repetitive, perhaps mind-numbing. This daily grind I am describing is summed up by this commercial from the mid-80s.

With many more years down the road, I am pleased to report that even though certain boring, repetitive tasks are unavoidable, we humans are able to master them rather easily. This allows us to get back to horsing around and amusing ourselves much in the same way we would amuse ourselves in our youth. In fact, consciously trying to channel more child-like open-mindedness has become a key to retaining access to my own creativity and imagination over the years.

So, we don’t have to “grow up.” It’s entirely optional.

But we always, always, always have to keep learning. The world is changing too fast to think that we will ever fully know what we need to know. There may have been such a time at the apex of the post-World War II “goldilocks” period, when the charts tracking our prosperity were all moving up and to the right, and the world was relatively peaceful. But that period is behind us. The world is more dynamic and uncertain today, and sadly less peaceful. So we need to keep learning, using our innate childlike creativity to navigate this dynamism.

So there it is - a commencement address in one sentence.

For those of you wondering why I’ve made no mention of our dog Nova thus far, it’s because we had to say goodbye to her last Wednesday. As sad as it was, Lori and I know that we “stuck the landing,” interceding to end our girl’s discomfort quickly, before it became too much to ask (while maximizing our time together). That sweet pooch had an optimal life, given the hand that she had been dealt, health-wise. I hope that we can all be so lucky.

Sunday Supper

The last couple of weekends, I’ve purchased two bunches of beets, prepping and eating them in their entirety - roots, stems and greens. At $4/bunch, this is an amazing value. For eight bucks I can roast a half-sheet pan of the roots, all the while sautéing a big pan of the greens and stems with some onion and garlic, finishing them with a little acid, like lemon juice or some type of vinegar (I like a couple dashes of Tabasco as well). This recipe for Sautéed Beet Greens is a great basic approach to cooking beet greens. These Lemon-Pepper Chicken Breasts are fun. This Spicy Ground Turkey and Snap Peas looks healthy and leans into Spring peas.

Sunday Music

Play this Jazz Piano playlist, and you’ll get an idea of how cool it is to have Lori sitting at the baby grand in your living room. This collaboration between and Dixie Chicks and James Taylor is worth a listen, too. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  You can do anything you set your mind to. Let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Iron City Insights

Happy Mother's Day to all mothers who might be reading this! It’s been more than three years since my mom passed, and sometimes I still half-expect to bump into her at Ross’ Market. Time marches on…

Another quick Nova update, since so many of you ask me about our dog: She continues to hang in there, even though the growth on her forehead continues to get more pronounced. Who knows how long this can continue without other symptoms presenting themselves? We’re just loving her and keeping a close eye on her behavior and other symptoms. One day at a time…

I had a fantastic retreat with my EO Forum mates in Pittsburgh this past week. Each time I step away from the day-to-day, I marvel at how impactful it can be to simply take a clarity break - it is then supercharged when we are surrounded by amazing people.

Our first day together was focused on catching up with each other, and thinking big. We visited Fallingwater, the warhol, and Randyland. Soaking in the work of people who are/were so different from their peers was very refreshing.

Day Two we each underwent a SWOT analysis, followed by a Hoshin Kanri exercise to stack rank the various opportunities and determine which warranted our focused effort in the months ahead. We also were blown away by some real-world examples of how Artificial Intelligence (AI) can be applied to each of our businesses.

Day Three was all about laying out our plans for the next few months - in detail, with specific, measurable outcomes that we will all be tracking and sharing with each other. It feels great to have so much clarity regarding what I need to do (and why), and some accountability buddies to support each other as we get to work.

We enjoyed great meals at the Monterey Bay Fish Grotto at the top of Mt. Washington overlooking the city, and Senti (which served the best lasagna I’ve ever had at a restaurant). Of course, for lunch one day we had to order sandwiches from Primanti Brothers. The Dog Penn was a super-fun spot for pre-dinner cocktails one night. As luck would have it, CrossFit Athletics was just two blocks from the Southside AirBnB rental we secured for our group, so I was able to work out early to start each day.

Pittsburgh is a great city! I highly recommend a visit. I also recommend taking quarterly clarity breaks. Strongly consider it, even if you think you can’t spare the time. It will yield a net time savings by giving you more clarity and focus. Trust me, I’ve gone through this mental wrestling match. This ritual has proven its value to me.

Sunday Supper

I’m making Lori a wonderful omelet with cheese and mushrooms from the Granville Farmers Market for Mother's Day brunch, along with some roasted fingerling potatoes. For supper, I’m going to prep this great Bolognese sauce (and serve it over roasted cauliflower for a low-carb meal). These Sheet-Pan Sun-Dried Tomato Chicken Bowls also look delicious.

Sunday Music

This performance by the Brad Mehldau Trio is so good. So is this performance/interview with Sierra Hull on World Cafe. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  You can do anything you set your mind to. Let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Tenacity & Quitting

First, a Nova note: She is still with us, hanging in there. We are loving every moment we have with our beautiful puppy girl. Thanks to everyone who has sent kind notes regarding her situation.

Not completely unrelated to managing Nova’s declining health, I often ponder the challenge of striking the right balance between staying tenacious and deciding when to abandon a goal.

Media is rife with stories of people who irrationally hung in there, eventually accomplishing something amazing. JK Rowling, who eventually published the Harry Potter book series, making her wealthier than the Queen of England. Harland Sanders and his tenacious pursuit of growing the Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant chain (he was in his 60s before it was successful). Steve Jobs being forced out of Apple, only to return and save it from the brink of ruin. Unreasonably tenacious sometimes pays off.

And then there are those whose path to their greatest success can be attributed to strategic quitting. Oprah Winfrey had to leave he co-anchor position on WJZ-TV in Baltimore in order for her creativity to conceive of her talk show. Jeff Bezos had to leave a well-paying job to start Amazon. And Reed Hastings (founder of Netflix) had to sell his successful software business before he would land on the initial idea that made Netflix such a success (no late fees).

Of course, the literal polar opposite of Netflix was Blockbuster Video. They were tenacious - irrationally hanging on to their late fee-driven business model, riding it all the way down to bankruptcy. And Kodak, tenaciously insisting it was in the film processing business rather than photography. Jeffrey Katzenberg and Meg Whitman lit almost $2 billion on fire, insisting that their short-format video streaming business, Quibi, would be successful before finally pulling the plug. Plenty of people ride their tenaciousness all the way to ruin.

And sometimes we quit too soon. Ronald Wayne had a 10% stake in Apple computer, but got cold feet just 12 days into the venture and cashed out his $800 - which would be worth more than $100 billion today. There was a time in the late 1970s when Ross Perot had an opportunity to purchase Microsoft for something like $6 - $15 million, but decided it was was too rich for his blood, and walked away from hundreds of billions of dollars.

This is all to say that there are examples of tenaciousness paying off, and tenaciousness leading to ruin. Strategic quitting has unlocked major successes, and rendered some people an object lesson in poor decision-making.

Maybe there is no rhyme or reason. Maybe it mostly boils down to luck. I’d like to think these are some decent rules for striking a balance between Hanging In There and Bailing:

• Do your best to clearly define what success and failure looks like for any given project.

• Reflect often - take the time to really review how the project is going. Don’t get caught on the treadmill of doing, doing, doing such that you stop thinking.

• Don’t fall for the sunk cost fallacy. Just because resources have been spent does not mean you obligated to keep spending your way to ruin.

• Opportunity Costs are real, too. What else could you be spending your precious time and other resources on if you shut down the current project?

Signs you should hang in there a while longer:

• You are seeing incremental progress, but its slower than you expected.

• The underlying reasons for pursuing the goal remain valid.

• You haven’t yet implemented your full strategy (give it a chance).

• The obstacles you face are related to execution, not fundamental flaws in your thesis.

Signs it may be time to quit:

• Despite genuine effort, very little progress has been made.

• The landscape has changed that makes your goal less valuable.

• You’ve discovered a (previously unknown) superior alternative that renders your goal moot.

• Continuing would require sacrificing core values or well-being.

There is no path through life that doesn’t continue a few “what ifs.” It’s hard to know when to re-commit to something, versus choosing an entirely new direction. The easiest person to fool is often ourselves - cultivating objectiveness and sometimes brutal honesty with yourself will help you make the tough call.

Sunday Supper

These Potato-Cheese Pierogies w/ Bacon look fun and delicious. Get a jump on Cinco de Mayo with these Chicken Fajitas, or this Mexican Chopped Salad with Cumin Vinaigrette.

Sunday Music

This recent performance by Madison McFerrin at the NPR Tiny Desk is fun - exploratory in ways that make sense when you realize that she is the daughter of Mr. Bobby McFerrin. And here’s a jam from Goose, from last December. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

A Week In The Life

I was not firing on all cylinders this past week. Monday morning I had some minor oral surgery. Afterwards, my mouth felt like I had been forced to eat an entire box of Cap’n Crunch cereal without milk in five minutes or less, followed immediately by eating the hottest slice of cheese pizza imaginable. Thankfully, my mouth feels better today.

Our dog Nova’s decline continues, and it has started to disrupt my sleep. Friday morning, worried that the veterinarian would not be available to us should we need them over the weekend, I made an appointment to have them lay eyes on my girl before the end of the day. I didn’t think we would need to say goodbye right then and there, but I needed their experienced opinion to reassure me that she would make it through another weekend.

When it comes to knowing when the right time is to let them go, my years of living with pets can be distilled into one sentence: “A day early is better than a day late.” So I’m being vigilant. I’ll be surprised if she is still with us this time next week. This sucks, but it has been a joy to have her in our lives, and I know that she has had the best life possible. This is an obligation from which I would never shy away. We’re doing things right.

I spent a few hours in the Denison Biological Reserve Saturday, walking the trails and having some thoughtful conversations with a few good men. The morning started off cool and breezy, warming up by 2pm when we all went our separate ways. All the walking, sun and fresh air made it easy to catch a much-needed nap when I returned home.

Despite my sadness, my lack of rest, my fuzzy mind state, I know what I need to focus on, work-wise in the days ahead. This clarity is reassuring. I may not accomplish as much as I would in a “normal” week, but I will work with focus, accepting the fact that the week will not be normal.

Regular readers of my essays will know that I like to reflect on each week, trying to discern some central theme and drilling into it a bit. Lately the themes have circled around grief and mortality. I feel like I have reached my current limit in examining them, and apologize for their repeated appearance. But Nova has been the star of the show this week.

I was tempted to skip the weekly writing ritual. Nobody wants to hear more of this sad shit from me. But a deadline is a deadline. I believe in showing up, even when I don’t have much in the tank. So here it is. See you next week.

Sunday Supper

My sore mouth was soothed by this soft, smooth Spring Risotto this past week. This Apple and Fennel Salad looks good. And this Thai Hot-and-Sour Coconut Chicken Soup looks distinctive and soothing.

Sunday Music

This morning vinyl/dub set is a good way to ease into this Sunday morning. This cover of Prince’s How Come U Don't Call Me Anymore is so well done. So too is this cover of the Goo Goo Dolls song, Iris. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Born Again (And Again)

Yesterday I mowed the lawn for the first time this year. The smell of fresh-cut grass a guarantee that Spring is here.

As my Christian friends commemorate the resurrection of Jesus today, I find myself thinking about the many times my life has been renewed over the years.

There was the time when, in grade school, I first stood up to a bully. Or when I first performed on stage. All of life’s early rites of passage: romantic relationships and friendships that run their course. Absorbing lots of knowledge during college, then realizing how much more I still had to learn. Marriage, parenthood, and now empty-nesterhood. Entrepreneurship. They all turned me into a fundamentally different version of myself.

One of the central lessons of my life is the lesson of impermanence. On some time scale, everything here on Earth comes to an end. Anything that is truly eternal is mostly beyond my comprehension, and I am comfortable with this.

Every night we fall asleep, and awake renewed. Every Fall the leaves drop from the trees, Winter sets in, then eventually the trees bud again. The spring peepers herald yet another year of renewal. Our friends and loved ones drop like leaves, each on their own unique schedule.

After a few decades, we begin to notice patterns. And we begin to recognize that we can intentionally revise and renew ourselves. We can seek out specific transformational experiences. We can take on specific challenges that we know will require something new of us. We stop chasing shallow, meaningless things and focus on the most important. This heightens our engagement with life, making every day special, and too brief.

I know that not everyone experiences the full spectrum of the progression I describe. I’m sure that other people might look at my timeline and think “Wow, he really missed out on some good lessons.”

One of the coolest things about this current point in time for me is talking with my adult children, getting a sense of how they are navigating their lives. I try to mostly be a sounding board, asking open-ended questions. Posing “what if” thought experiments. Helping them examine important decisions from as many angles as possible, and expressing confidence in their ability to make the choice that is right for them.

I’ve come to believe that one of the tallest tasks for all of us is to simply develop our self awareness. The more we know about ourselves, what lights us up (and why), the easier it is to make the right decisions for ourselves. If you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there. It takes time to figure out what roads we should be traveling.

Early in my life, I think I tended to follow the path of least resistance, and was pretty random in terms of trying different things. Pruning out pathways after finding those that were not right for me. It’s the rare 18-year old that knows exactly what they want to do with their life, and runs straight at it. We tend to bounce around a bit, before settling into something that works for us.

We all start somewhere, and hopefully advance in a positive direction from there. I am immensely grateful for the position I find myself in today - and for the fact that tomorrow can be even better.

Sunday Supper

We’re going to enjoy this Chicken Shawarma on salad greens today, and these Horseradish Deviled Eggs. These Chocolate Easter Egg Nests look like a fun holiday treat.

Sunday Music

Imagine driving through Eau Claire Wisconsin, listening to this interview of Justin Vernon by Krista Tippet and learning that he grew up in Eau Claire. That happened to me this past week. So I had to feature him here - this live performance for NPR is wonderful. This performance by Hania Rani is lovely as well. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Master’s Sunday

The trees have shed many branches over the winter. So I need to spend an hour or two picking up the sticks before I can begin to mow the lush green grass in the yard. The dead ornamental grass needs to be cut and composted, in order for the spring daffodils to flourish. There are any number of work-related things I could/should be doing today. I will do none of them. Instead, the sport of golf will get most of my energy today.

Today in Augusta, Georgia, Rory McIlroy and Bryson DeChambeau will play in the final group of the final round of The Masters tournament, each vying for their first green jacket. If McIlroy wins, he will complete the “career Grand Slam,” winning each of golf’s four major tournaments at least one time. He would be just the sixth person to ever accomplish this feat. Bryson has won just one major tournament thus far in his career - last year’s U.S. Open, but he did so by overtaking McIlroy on the final hole of the 72-hole tournament, accomplishing a miraculous up-and-down from a sand bunker 80 yards from the pin.

I am often ambivalent about being a spectator of high-level athletic competitions, preferring to be active in my own chosen arena(s) rather than passively sitting on the sidelines, rooting for others. But this year the stars have lined up and I’m all-in on seeing how the tournament plays out today.

The key aspect of competitive golf is the zen-like mental challenge it poses. The amount of present-moment awareness one needs in order to perfectly execute a given golf shot is enormous. And then there is the paradox of maintaining a sense of non-attachment to the outcome of any given shot. Converting the strong desire for the ball to go into the hole into a focus on executing exactly the intended stroke, regardless of outcome, is the essential challenge of the game.

Effortless effort, trying not to try…just letting events unfold while contributing to them with your highest and best intention. Balancing this with one’s competitive urges, with one’s desires for recognition - this is what golf fans everywhere will be tuning in to watch today. How do these guys perform with so much at stake?

I have a 1:40pm tee time today to play a round with friends. This should wrap up in time for us to see the final groups play the last few holes of the tournament. A perfect balance between my fascination with today’s drama in Augusta, and my desire to actually be in the arena. My friends in North Carolina and Texas have been playing plenty of golf already this year. But in Ohio, today is Opening Day.

Sunday Supper

I’m popping a big roaster full of this Barbacoa recipe in the oven before heading to the golf course this afternoon. This Asparagus Quiche is a perfect Spring dish. These Cheesy Cuban Chicken Taquitos look fun. For a sweet finish, how about these Lemon Sugar Cookie Ice Cream Sandwiches?

Sunday Music

This Sunday Morning Playlist from Seiju is a nice way to start this day. This performance by Nubya Garcia at the NPR Tiny Desk is also fantastic. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Ohana

This week I had the good fortune to attend Entrepreneur Organization’s Global Leadership Conference in Honolulu, Hawaii. Without fail, surrounding myself with the energy, intellect and excellence of hundreds of entrepreneurs revs me up like nothing else. It has been quite a while since I’ve attended a global EO event, so the energy here felt especially fresh and vibrant.

The theme of the conference was Ohana, a Hawaiian term signifying family, but in a broader sense. Beyond blood relatives, Ohana includes our closest friends, adopted family, and other close-knit communities to which we belong. In the opening session, a Hawaiian elder explained that Ohana also includes those family members who are no longer with us. He used the phrase “The past is in front of us, and the future is behind us.” This sounds confusing to the uninitiated, but it makes sense when you think that our parents who have passed away have given us a glimpse of our own future, and as we approach the end of our lives, those of us with children know that our children will carry a piece of us into the future. I appreciate the expansiveness of the concept.

As I prepare to lead EO Columbus’ membership recruitment efforts starting July 1st, I will be working to grow Central Ohio’s entrepreneurial community with this same expansive mindset.

One of the many benefits of being an EO member is the access the organization offers to world-class thought leaders. This week included keynote speeches and chats with Guy Kawasaki, Brad Montague, Deepak Chopra, Ryan Holiday and Marcus Lemonis. Each offered valuable insights, and made me so grateful to be a part of this community and able to work with so many amazing people to grow and strengthen it further.

Children’s author and creator of the amazing YouTube video series, Kid President - Brad Montague was for me the surprise hit of the conference. His creativity and passion are contagious. Talking about how entrepreneurs love to sink their teeth into “probertunities,” and his recognition that failure is a part of the process of growth with his Fail-A-Bration initiative were both funny and memorable. He reminded us that the two stories leaders must always be sharing are: 1) This is who we are, and 2) This is where we’re going.

Montague pointed out that using data helps us promote knowledge, but that good stories promote belief.

Lastly, he offered four rules for being a Time Scout (you must attend one of Montague’s Future Camp workshops to to learn what a Time Scout is). These rules apply to your average run-of-the-mill leaders too:

1) You cannot change the past.

2) We are custodians of NOW.

3) Time is to be experienced, not conquered. Enjoy it.

4) Clean up after yourself.

As business educator Peter Drucker once said, “The best way to predict the future is to create it.” Go visit the future, Time Scouts, then come back to the present and get to work.

Sunday Supper

This Green Goddess Roasted Chicken looks amazing. I look forward to trying this Vietnamese Shrimp and Quinoa Salad recipe in the week ahead.

Sunday Music

Here’s some wonderful Hawaiian steel guitar music to soothe your Sunday. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Community Table

We had our first bona fide dinner party in a long, long time last night. Lori and I, plus three other couples. They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and it was so true in this case.

The conversations were special. We’ve been apart long enough to see just how different we are today from the last time we gathered together. Obviously, a little older, a little more gray in our hair. But grounded in something closer to base level truth. We’ve all wrestled with health issues (our own and/or loved ones), gone on adventures, with more planned in the months ahead. We’ve gotten more hip to the various ways people numb themselves here in the U S of A.

I had hoped to make the Bolognese Lasagna Rolls featured in last week’s essay for last night’s gathering. The recipe was elaborate enough that I felt I should make a test run last week to ensure that I could pull it off. The test went reasonably well, but it took a lot of time - more than I had available at the end of this week for a kitchen project. So I ordered a pan of lasagna from Vincenzo’s, and it was delicious. Making this choice is a sign of personal growth, believe it or not. The money/time/taste trade was completely worth it in this case. The point of the evening was the people, not to showcase my culinary skills.

Saving my energy for our guests, rather than spending it all in a mad dash of cooking, was the exact right approach. Speaking of energy, I did not partake in any alcohol consumption last night. So I woke this morning well-rested. I would characterize my relationship with alcohol as “default dry” - preferring to not drink generally, but allowing for the occasional exception.

Last night felt like a “moment” - the moment when we were able to re-join the broader community in some fundamental way. I’m looking forward to experiencing more of this kind of reunion in the weeks and months ahead.

Sunday Supper

This Burgoo looks like a great Sunday meal to prep, that could carry you into the week with some sturdy leftovers. This Cornbread recipe would pair wonderfully with it. This Blackened Salmon Caesar Salad sounds great, too.

Sunday Music

This Sunday I share with you a live performance by one of America’s under-appreciated singer/songwriters, Mr. John Hiatt. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.


Peace & Love,

Open & Shut

Recently in one of my social media feeds, I saw The Atlantic promoting a recent article by Boris Kachka titled The Danger of a Too-Open Mind. The premise of the title captured me. The more common observation is when someone is too closed-minded. To flip this and ask the question “What does it mean to be too open-minded?” Is a great thought experiment. I have not yet read the article, but intend to. In the meantime, I will engage with the thought experiment here.

Closed-mindedness is the more thoroughly documented end of the spectrum. It includes the person who refuses to sample new cuisine, the person who limits their information diet to just a few narrow media outlets, and the patient who rejects their doctor’s counsel because it conflicts with something they read online. On the extremely open-minded end of the spectrum, we find people who believe that the Earth is flat, that 9/11 was an inside job, and that vaccines don’t work.

So what is the optimal stance for a civic-minded person to maintain in the face of our human tendency to rationalize things or suffer confirmation bias, when the digital world is flooded with misinformation explicitly designed to confuse us? How do we know when it is appropriate to change our minds?

Finding the right balance between being too closed-minded and too open-minded involves developing a thoughtful approach to evaluating new ideas. Here are some strategies:

Practice evidence-based thinking: Be willing to consider new perspectives, but require reasonable proof before fully accepting them.

Develop healthy skepticism: Question claims while remaining genuinely open to being convinced. This differs from cynicism (assuming everything is false) and gullibility (accepting everything as true).

Recognize your biases: We all have cognitive biases that influence our thinking. Being aware of these tendencies helps you compensate for them when evaluating information.

Seek diverse perspectives: Intentionally expose yourself to viewpoints that differ from your own, particularly from credible sources with different backgrounds or expertise.

Apply proportional confidence: Match your level of certainty to the quantity and quality of available evidence.

Establish evaluation criteria: Before considering a new idea or approach, determine what would need to be true for it to be valid.

Practice intellectual humility: Acknowledge the limits of your knowledge and expertise. Be willing to say "I don't know" and to change your mind when warranted.

Consider practical consequences: Evaluate both the potential benefits and risks of accepting new ideas, especially before making significant changes based on them.

Give ideas appropriate time: Some concepts need sufficient testing before you can fairly evaluate them, while others may deserve prompt rejection if they lack basic plausibility.

Focus on learning, not winning: Approach disagreements as opportunities to deepen understanding rather than competitions to be won.

Our goal shouldn't be perfect neutrality but rather a mindful approach that's receptive to valuable new ideas while maintaining critical standards for what you ultimately accept.

Our minds should be neither fully open, nor fully closed. They should always be a ajar - narrowed enough to spare us the time and energy required to examine the most outlandish things, but open enough to let through real breakthroughs in our understanding of what is true about the world.

Sunday Supper

These Bolognese Lasagna Rosettes look amazing, though very labor-intensive. This salad would be a good complement to the pasta dish. And Cereal Milk Panna Cotta for a fantastic finish.

Sunday Music

This Sunday morning, please enjoy this Cozy Pancakes Brunch Bar Jazz mix as you figure out just how far you need to open (or close) your mind for optimal discernment of reality. This performance by Aretha Franklin of the American classic (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman at the 2015 celebration of Carole King’s contribution to the arts at the Kennedy Center gets me every time. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Last Of His Kind

“Dad passing today, will report later.” - a concise, jarring message to get from Lori just before I was to jump on a ZOOM meeting Wednesday morning. Her dad’s health has been in steady decline for the better part of the past year. We knew he wasn’t far from the finish line, but as my friend Peter says, living gets to be quite a habit. In my experience no matter how much it may make rational sense, the finality of a loved one taking their last breath really packs a punch. And so it did with Jack.

Born in Strasburg, Ohio 1930, Jack Fuhrer enlisted in the Air Force during the Korean War. Color blindness prevented him from becoming an Air Force pilot. Instead he became a two-way radio technician and spent his service years in Japan. Upon returning to Ohio, Jack spent much of his life farming. Like my dad, Jack could fix anything - an essential skill for keeping farm equipment running.

In his 30s, Jack broke some things that could not be completely fixed - his ankles. He fell off the roof of a house he was working on, landing awkwardly on some construction debris. A tough injury, but Jack was tougher. His ankles were effectively if not literally fused, making them far less mobile than normal. Once he healed up to the point of “good enough,” Jack just got on with things. I never heard him complain about it, ever. The injury left him with poor blood flow in his feet, which made it really hard to heal even the lightest abrasions he might get on his feet.

His mechanical acumen and love of aviation meant that he would become an avid private pilot. He built (and rebuilt) multiple aircraft, and owned many others over the years. He spread this love of flying to his son Herb, and grandson Josh (who is now a commercial pilot). I forget the age at which no insurance company would sell him Pilot Insurance (somewhere in his 80s, I think) - at that point he simply purchased a different class of aircraft (experimental) that required no such insurance. Just as with his ankle issues, Jack just kept going.

He wasn’t as talkative as some people - but when he had something to say, it was usually pretty memorable. Hmmm…an obstinate contrarian with a razor-sharp wit…I’m trying to think if that reminds me of anyone…it’ll come to me.

While only some of his kids took up his passion for flying, they all received a healthy dose of his stubbornness. As Jack’s needs for support increased these last few years, Lori and her brothers simply increased their support of him. The goal was to allow him to die at home, and they came very close to achieving this. Despite their heroic efforts, it was in Jack’s best interests to spend some time in a long-term care facility - but only a few weeks.

Jack is the last grandparent to leave us. My dad passed in 2008 - too soon to be memorialized in this weekly essay. Next came my mom in 2021, then Lori’s mom in 2023. From the time of my mom’s cancer diagnosis in 2020 until this week, a consistent, significant amount of our weekly energy has been devoted to supporting our parents as their lives wound down. Knowing that this gauntlet has come to an end carries extra weight. We have immense gratitude for being able to do what we have done, and very real relief that it is no longer required.

It’s time to rest a bit, regroup - and then get right back at it. Life is for the living. Jack Fuhrer sure wrung out every drop of living that he could. We’ll do the same.

Sunday Supper

Tomorrow is St. Patrick’s Day. So Corned Beef Hash makes sense. And these Potato Pancakes seem comforting. I must admit, I got a Shamrock Shake at McDonald’s this week - this version is better, especially if you use Jeni’s ice cream, Snowville Whole Milk and ditch the food coloring. Lastly, I made this Beet Salad last week, and loved it. If you love beets, you will too.

Sunday Music

This song by Jason Isbell makes me think of Jack. Willie Nelson is just three years younger than Jack - here is Willie singing You Were Always On My Mind just last year. To wrap up, here’s Gregory Alan Isakov performing live on KEXP about one year ago. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Tied For First Place

At Nova’s annual check-up about two weeks ago, Dr. Wagner noticed a lump high on her snout, skewing right-of-center not far from her eye. As soon as he pointed it out, it was obvious, but up until that point I had not noticed it at all. Something about her brindle coat made it invisible, I guess. We agreed that I would monitor it and update him in two weeks. It only took one before I felt compelled to call him. She’d been sneezing a fair amount, and once produced a big goober with some blood in it. That was a enough for us to schedule an X-ray and a needle biopsy to start diagnosing what we were observing.

The word came last Tuesday that it is likely a sarcoma, and that more imaging (a CT-scan this time) would be required to understand in detail where this mass is positioned in her head, and whether it is in the bone of her skull. From there a treatment plan that would likely include surgery, radiation, and perhaps chemotherapy can be drafted. (FYI - Everything Dr. Wagner told me was reaffirmed by the Claude AI when I entered a few queries into it immediately after speaking with him. Claude estimates the cost of the treatment plan between $7,000 - $20,000.)

Having lost both of my parents to cancer, this situation feels very familiar. I’m going to meet with the doctors at the fancy corporate veterinary outfit (rhymes with “Red Bet”), but am wary of the expense of the treatment, and how much discomfort it might impose on this creature that I love so much. I can see how easy it would be to pull out all of the stops to fight the disease, so my inner contrarian kicks in to offset this urge. And my mental map has already been programmed to think that if cancer gets the drop on you, your goose is already cooked. But I want to learn a bit more before deciding on the path forward.

At it’s root, this situation is testing my theories for how I would manage my own cancer diagnosis, should I ever receive one. Under certain circumstances, I would like to think that I would have the grace to just let nature take its course. My puppy girl is 9 years old - at best having 5-6 years left in the absence of the cancer. I think the oldest dog we’ve ever had died at 12 or 13 years of age.

This situation is also testing my ability to accept things that are beyond my control, focusing instead on things I can actually impact with my efforts.

When I sweet talk her, I often tell Nova that she’s my Best Girl - but I always add the caveat “You’re tied for first place.” I have loved each of my dogs so much that it feels like a disservice to place my current dog higher in the pecking order than the ones that came before. To the extent that Nova is any better than Ella, Coltrane or Margot, it’s only because the earlier dogs trained me to be a better owner.

Nova is still 100% herself, and in no discomfort. We’ll learn more in the days ahead, and enjoy every day to the fullest. I’ll be keeping a close eye on this turtle sundae-mottled glamour queen and snuggling with her hard on the couch every night.

Sunday Supper

With one of our man-children home for Spring Break this week, I intend to make this Pasta e Fagioli to keep us all fed (I’m going to cook some tortellini separately, folding it into the bean soup for those of us who can eat gluten). This Gochugaru Salmon with Crispy Rice also looks amazing.

Sunday Music

This performance by Saya Gray at the NPR Tiny Desk is fun. Alfa Mist delivers almost an hour of their fun grooves here. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Systems Thinking

I read a really good book this week and I want to share some thoughts about it. It is an easy read, so if this brief overview resonates I highly recommend read it in its entirety. It is called The Power of Systems: How To Create A Life That Works, and it is co-authored by Steve Chandler & Trevor Timbeck. This book was the most succinct, efficient takedown of what I call my “negative inner critic” than I could have ever dreamed of. After reading the last page, I thought “Well, now you can stop beating yourself up, Neal, and just focus on revising the systems in your life that aren’t working.” I may need to re-read the book from time-to-time to reinforce things, but it’s possible that the lesson will stick without such reinforcement. It’s just that simple and straightforward.

It’s premise is that the achieving the outcomes that we seek need not be a function of personal willpower. For example, consider the following three systems for achieving the outcome of exercising at the gym five times a week:

System 1: Wake up each morning, see how I feel, look at my calendar and then decide when to go to the gym.

System 2: Create a spreadsheet to track the number of days each week I make it to the gym. Block out five gym sessions on my calendar over the next week. Every Sunday, enter the number of workouts into the spreadsheet and schedule five more workouts for the following week.

System 3: Looking out two weeks into the future, for each and every day block out two times to work out at the gym, labeling them “Gym Plan A” and “Gym Plan B.” When you wake up each day, commit to at least one of those workout times and attend. On days when you have achieved your weekly goal of five workouts, you can delete both the A and B options if you feel like your body needs a rest day.

Three different approaches to achieving the same outcome. Depending on the person who is implementing the system, one of them will prove to be more effective than the others. And think of how many other approaches exist - lots of options for finding the best approach for any individual.

So, whatever your goals (exercise, work stuff, cleaning/organizing the house, whatever) - stop beating yourself up about your lack of resolve or lack of willpower and examine the current system that is not working. Try something new.

What if you gave yourself grace, choosing to not be self-critical, not dwelling on the past things that haven’t been working? What if you came up with a new plan, an intentional plan, and gave it a whirl?

This approach to living fits nicely with the concepts in James Clear’s book, Atomic Habits. The talk that Clear gave at the Bryn Du Mansion last Fall continues to resonate for me. His basic message is: “Make it as easy as possible to do the things that need done to create the future you desire.” That sounds like a system to me.

Don’t dwell on the psychology of why you didn’t do the thing that you know you want to do! Simply reconfigure your system of doing into something that works. If you think this is some cute workaround, who cares - so long as it works? Perhaps revising a personal system is simply a way of renewing our vows to the goal we still desire. Renew that vow, and get after it.

Sunday Supper

Mardi Gras is this Tuesday. Throw a few strands of beads around your neck and make yourself a nice bowl of Gumbo, or Red Beans & Rice. I’m a sucker for Fattoush, too.

Sunday Music

Here’s Jason Isbell performing a new song from his recently-released solo acoustic album, Foxes In The Snow. And here is ninety minutes of Jazzy Jane playing the songs of Bill Evans. This time of year I always think of his song, You Must Believe In Spring. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Catalysts & Callings

What prompts us to change? Sometimes life delivers a swift kick that leaves us no choice. Other times, change whispers to us so quietly we almost miss it.

Let’s call the “swift kick” version of change a Catalytic Moment. A wildfire burns down your house. Your spouse moves out and files for divorce. You suffer a heart attack. In this type of scenario, the outside catalyst imposes itself on you, and then you have to deal with it (sometimes rather quickly). When catalytic change occurs, you can mark your life in terms of before and after the big event.

The quieter type of change - the one that you can miss if you’re not paying attention, is sometimes referred to as “Finding your calling.” In this scenario, you discover some insight about yourself and/or the world around you, landing you on a “big idea” that feels like it came out of nowhere, and could be really cool. People are called to religious missionary work. People are called to make the world more just, or fair. Some people are called to reduce the suffering of animals, or to preserve some endangered species. Whatever it is, the calling literally attracts you toward it.

Catalytic change is like a lightning bolt - it strikes with a lot of energy, and this energy transfers to you in some way. Sometimes it truly triggers one’s survival instinct. At a minimum, it shakes you out of whatever has traditionally felt “normal” and forces you to reexamine your base level assumptions, often taking quick action.

Callings are more subtle - like a tiny flame, fueled by just a bit of kindling and in need of protection. Shelter it from the wind, and continue to feed it larger and larger pieces of fuel. The energy behind the calling-directed change builds more slowly. During this ramp-up period, the world around us doesn’t yet know or acknowledge the epiphany that has occurred within you. You have to work on it in isolation before the world can see it.

So, catalytic change often provides us with the initial energy required to overcome the inertia of being at a standstill. Catalytic change gets us off of our ass. A calling is more like a magnet - attracting you to start walking a long path, but with a weaker overall force.

These two types of change are not mutually exclusive. The heart attack may spark a resolute commitment to healthy eating and exercise, culminating in significant weight loss and increased fitness. Then the calling can sneak in behind, motivating you to become mission-driven around helping others to reclaim their own health for the rest of your life.

I tend to prefer the idea of being calling-directed. I don’t like the idea of being pushed around by the universe. I like the version of change where we all have a high degree of agency, and self-awareness, and are working for something (rather than reacting in response to something).

I think the world would be a better place if more of us were operating in a calling-directed way. Call me a romantic. To quote the great cartoonist Bill Watterson: “To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.”

Maybe sometimes we need to get kicked in the teeth…who knows? Perhaps we should ask the Zen Farmer.

Sunday Supper

I made this Ham & Bean soup this past week, and it really hit the spot. I paired it with this cornbread recipe, with one modification: I preheated the cast iron skillet, then melted all the butter in the hot pan, pouring the cornbread batter right into the pan on the hot oil. This ensures a crispy crust, which I really like. This Crunch Salad looks great, too.

Sunday Music

This concert on KEXP by Noga Erez is a new discovery for me. This performance by Leon Thomas at the NPR Tiny Desk is also really groovy. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Live From New York

Tonight at 8pm, NBC celebrates the 50th anniversary of Saturday Night Live. The show has heavily influenced my development. I was six years old when it debuted on October 11th, 1975. By the time I was in middle school, I wore the arrow-through-the-head gag while simultaneously mowing the grass and listening to Steve Martin’s comedy album Let’s Get Small - while reciting Martin’s act from memory, imitating every facet of his delivery.

In 1983 or thereabouts, my cousin Myra took me and the Secrest twins to see Eddie Murphy perform on his Delirious tour at Veteran’s Memorial Hall. I still remember the view from the rafters, Murphy stalking the stage in his all red leather outfit, telling us jokes we had heard numerous times before, and us cackling at every punchline.

I don’t think it goes too far to say that SNL shaped who I’ve become. I instinctively look for the humor in every situation, no matter how dark. I’ve learned to be careful about verbalizing some of these cerebral lightning bolts, but they happen all the time, even today. This is not to say that I consider myself especially funny, just that I care a lot about what actually is funny. What makes people laugh, and why.

This past week Maureen Dowd wrote an excellent piece on Lorne Michaels, the show’s creator and producer for all but three years of its 50-year lifespan. He is perhaps the ultimate curator of American culture. Ackroyd, Belushi, Chevy Chase, Bill Murray, Eddie Murphy, Adam Sandler, Will Ferrell, Gilda Radner, Norm McDonald, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Bill Hader, Chris Farley, Kate McKinnon…and so many other names unlisted that have made us all aggressively laugh, numerous times. Michaels chose them all, and has developed a proven ritual for creating funny sketches, week in and week out, regardless of who may be hosting. If you could only pick one program to represent the American zeitgeist, SNL may be the best choice.

So, I’m going to geek out tonight and revel in the celebration. Five freaking decades of live comedy television. Unbelievable.

Sunday Supper

Lori and I made Scallops on Roasted Tomato Chickpeas this week, and loved it. And who doesn’t love Pad Thai? This Sweet Potato Bacon Salad with Warm Cider Dressing looks great (though I would add some roasted chicken thighs for extra protein).

Sunday Music

Sometimes we get a fever, and the only cure is more cowbell. This concert by Hermanos Gutiérrez on KEXP is wonderful. This concert by Max Richter at the NPR Tiny Desk kind of matches the grey, wet, cold day ahead. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Lucky Valentine

She’s not going to see this coming. This week I’m taking some time to bask in the Glory of Lori.

We were set up on a blind date. Our friends Doug & Cookie were our bosses before becoming lifelong friends, each owning their own business. They had a habit of co-locating their businesses next to each other, so the two crews had enjoyed many Friday happy hours over the years with each other. Lori had left Cookie’s employment to attend law school, but someone I worked with knew her and put us together. This was the first stroke of good luck - our overlapping social networks.

We hit it off right away. We talked a lot about food, and farming. I was in grad school, doing an independent study of a marketing idea I had - a delivery service for all of the merchants at the North Market. My thesis was that all of those workers in downtown Columbus would love it if they could order the great products offered by the North Market’s merchants and have them delivered to their offices before heading back home in the suburbs. In short, I was thinking some of the same things that Jeff Bezos was thinking, around the same time. He had a better plan, and has executed it well…but I got the girl. We ate at the Galaxy Cafe in Powell, one of my all-time favorite “joints.” Not fancy, but much care was taken in the sourcing of ingredients and the preparation of meals.

After meeting my best friend Peter for the first time, he offered me a 3-word directive: “Don’t blow it.” Somehow I pulled it off. We were married in 1997. Our firstborn arrived in 2000. So we had a few years before we came parents. It’s been about two years since we’ve felt like “empty-nesters.” Nearly perfect symmetry. Just the two of us, then four, now back to two. And we genuinely like each other. We kind of marvel at it.

How many people get to this point and no longer recognize their spouse? How many have been biding their time before parting ways, “for the kids?” On this side of things, I see how easily that could have been us. Too much stress of a particular type, at just the wrong time…sometimes circumstances exceed our capacity. But if you can run enough gauntlets without breaking, strengthening the bond through shared crucibles that galvanize rather than disintegrate…then you’ve really got something. Undoubtedly there are more challenges ahead, but we know what we have in each other, and will take them on.

We’ve come this far and are in pretty good shape. The road ahead looks pretty sweet. Let’s ride, baby.

Sunday Supper

Well, it is Super Bowl Sunday. I raided the Copia Farms freezer for some chicken wings, which I’m going to prepare this way. If I can spare the time, my intention is to make homemade pizza Hot Pockets using this Rough Pastry Dough and a filling of Mid’s Pizza Sauce, Italian sausage, Green Pepper and Mozzarella. This Slow Cooker Mongolian Beef is part of the meal prep plan for the week ahead as well.

Sunday Music

Pat Metheny & Charlie Haden playing their duet Waltz for Ruth is never a bad thing. This rendition of Funny Valentine by Rachelle Ferrell is wonderful. John Prine & Iris DeMent singing In Spite of Ourselves. How about a nice mix of Sade to round things out this week? Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Decisions & Outcomes

I am increasingly convinced that people really do not want to cook. Yesterday I had two experiences that support this. The first was a simple one - I was running some errands with a friend, and they wanted to snag from French fries from Arby’s. Easy enough to order, but the wait for the food stress tested the notion of “fast food.” Yet there were plenty of cars lined up for this experience. A little later in the day, I myself was looking to have some lunch. I’ve never been to Warrio’s Beef & Pork, but have heard great things about them. So I swung by, peeked in the door, and the line snaked throughout the interior so much…I didn’t have the time to spare to wait in that queue, and luckily Katalina’s down the street was less slammed. I understand queuing up for something great (and I suspect Warrio’s is great), but for Arby’s? I’m ready to blame cell phones for this. Stuck in a line? No problem, just check social media or work on today’s crossword puzzle. We blame our phones for so much, why not this too?

I swear I’m not relying solely on Tim Ferriss’ podcast for inspiration, but for two weeks running now, his thought-provoking interviews have inspired me. This week he spoke with Seth Godin, another person whose perspective I highly value. This interview was so rich I feel compelled to re-listen to it later today.

A portion of their conversation was dedicated to the concept that decisions and their outcomes do not always line up, in terms of their quality. Good decisions do not always yield good outcomes, and vice-versa.

For example, consider Kodak’s decision to slow-roll their own invention of digital photography. Their film production and processing business was so massive and lucrative at the time, it seemed insane to cannibalize it too quickly. What they failed to appreciate was just how quickly competitors would emerge to grow this new category, effectively closing Kodak out of the new game while driving the legacy business to near-zero. Reasonably good decision, but bad outcome.

On the flip side, consider any person who wins the lottery. As decisions go, buying a lottery ticket can only be viewed favorably by hanging a high value on the hopes and dreams that may be spawned by such a purchase. In terms of pure math, the net present value of a lottery tickets is always far less than the ticket price. Paying $2 or $5 for something that is worth close to $0 is always a bad decision - regardless of the fact that people win lottery prizes every week.

So how does one stay focused on improving the quality of their decisions, and avoid getting too hung up on any given outcome when evaluating their decision-making ability?

Journaling can be a valuable way to memorialize our rationale for making important decisions. Therefore, we can review this rationale post-facto to see what we may have missed (as well as what we got right).

Developing a formal checklist or framework for different types of decisions can be helpful. Things like listing key assumptions, calculating expected value, and forcing ourselves to consider multiple scenarios can ensure a certain amount of rigor behind our decisions.

Reviewing other people’s big decisions can be informative as well. For well-documented decisions (and their supporting rationale), we can assess decisions made by others pretty rigorously, which we can then learn from and inform our own future efforts.

We can and should regularly evaluate our decision-making ability. We should also not allow a few bad outcomes here and there to doubt ourselves.

Sunday Supper

I’ve lived in the Buckeye State my entire life, and I’ve never heard of the Sloppy Bird sandwich. Yet I am intrigued by the prospect of a “Chicken pot pie on a bun…”. This Cabbage Roll Soup seems straightforward and satisfying on a cold February night. These Salmon Burgers also caught my eye…having missed out on Warrio’s yesterday, maybe I’m just looking for an excuse to eat a good sandwich…

Sunday Music

Lori and I snuck over to Pittsburgh last Sunday see Martin Sexton perform many of the songs from The Beatles’ Abbey Road album, as well as some of his own songs. This performance of “Oh! Darling” is from this current tour. In addition to seeing Martin perform, we also came across the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile in the pre-dawn hours as we made our way back to Columbus. (Dreams do come true.) Lastly, this complete recording of a performance by the group I’m With Her for WGBH in Boston from 2019 should brighten your day. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Figure It Out

This essay was sparked when I listened to a recent interview of famed investor Chris Sacca by Tim Ferriss. (FYI - Chris’s vocabulary is frequently spiced with the “F” word. If that’s an issue for you, perhaps don’t listen to the interview.)

I really appreciate Sacca’s viewpoint - both in this interview and others I have listened to over the years. Despite his financial success, he strikes me as a person well-grounded in many of the values that I also hold. The key thing that I was reminded of by this interview was just how different my childhood was from that of my children. I was pretty feral in comparison.

Somehow I had forgotten how many miles I put on my 10-speed bike, riding to friends’ homes that were many miles from my own. I was reminded of the tree houses my friends and I erected on property that wasn’t ours, spending entire days 20 or 30 feet off of the ground, playing imaginary games and talking about everything imaginable. It was a much less structured existence - one where I had to fill the vacuum without the internet offering endless distraction. Things could go sideways, in a Lord Of The Flies kind of way back then. Arguments would arise, and we would have to hash it out, both verbally and sometimes physically. In those moments, we were on our own. There was just a general understanding with my mom that I should return home some time around sundown. But this was about the only rule governing my days.

This is not to suggest that I wish my childhood experience was simply cut-and-pasted onto my childrens’ lives. I recognize that there were probably predatory people taking advantage of youngsters back in those days. But getting into (and out of) jams, navigating personal conflict or friction is a skill that can only be developed through engagement.

Sacca is right that today’s youth are rarely put in a situation where they have to figure things out. So if you have kids today, I encourage you to allow them to meander into such situations sometimes. It will do them good. When they leave the protective bubble of your home and its surrounding community, they will find themselves in weird situations. Microdosing on weirdness will help prepare them to live in the broader world.

If Artificial Intelligence is as disruptive a technological change as many predict, we all are going to have to strengthen our “figure it out” muscles. Change is coming, at increasingly faster speeds. One specific example worth considering: I have heard many predictions that AI is going to drastically reduce the need for lawyers. How do we maintain a solid roster of experienced attorneys if much of entry-level legal work is automated away by AI? This same basic issue appears to exist in the realm of software engineering too.

There is an answer, but we might only discover it by wrestling with the new reality when it arrives. So I hope we all have developed our “figure it out” skills. We are probably going to need them more than ever.

SUNDAY SUPPER

I made some great Beef Broth this past week, using bones purchased from the Copia Farm self-serve market. I froze some of it, using the rest to make a pitch-perfect French Onion Soup. You can make some today, if you use store-bought broth. This Broccoli-Quinoa Soup w/ Turmeric & Ginger looks yummy, as do these Braised Greens with Andouille.

SUNDAY MUSIC

This concert by the Avishai Cohen Trio is just wonderful. This performance by Bilal at the NPR Tiny Desk is super-groovy, too. Enjoy!

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Peace & Love,

Acceptance & Agreement

I turned 56 this past week. I was with my EO Forum group in Dallas, where we were all setting our intentions for the year ahead and discussing ways that we can support each other. I’m so fortunate to be surrounded by these people who help me think clearer and with more ambition than I would on my own.

I’m also so very lucky to have Lori as my partner. We made it to Chapman’s Eat Market last night for dinner, and checked out Cobra Bar for a nightcap. Both were top-notch. We were probably the oldest people at Cobra Bar, but it was good to know that I still know what the “it” place to hang out in Columbus is.

In his Letter from Birmingham Jail, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. wrote, "We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny." This fundamental observation highlights a crucial distinction that is often missed: the difference between acceptance and agreement. While agreement implies alignment of values and beliefs, acceptance represents something far more essential to human coexistence – the recognition of our shared humanity and interconnected fate, regardless of our differences.

Dr. King demonstrated this principle throughout his life. He did not agree with the systems of segregation and discrimination that pervaded American society, yet he accepted the humanity of the people who upheld those systems. This acceptance manifested not as passive resignation but as active engagement with those he opposed. King's nonviolent philosophy required accepting the reality of one's opponents while also working to transform their hearts and minds.

This distinction between acceptance and agreement becomes particularly important in our increasingly polarized society. If we confuse these concepts, we can fall into the trap of believing that accepting others' existence and humanity somehow compromises our own values. This misconception leads to ideological isolation, which reduces our capacity for growth and understanding.

Dr. King's philosophy suggests that acceptance is actually a strength rather than a weakness. By accepting the humanity of those who opposed him, he maintained the moral high ground while creating space for dialogue and transformation. This approach required tremendous courage – the courage to face one's opponents without dehumanizing them, to acknowledge their existence while challenging their actions.

With Donald Trump’s second inauguration occurring on the national holiday celebrating Dr. King’s life, the difference between acceptance and agreement glows brightly in my mind.

SUNDAY SUPPER

Today I’m going to make a big batch of this Cola-Braised Beef with Chile-Lime Onions, along with this Potato Pavé with Parmesan Crust. I’ll pair them with some roasted cauliflower and a green salad to round things out. This should carry us empty-nesters pretty far into the week, dietarily.

SUNDAY MUSIC

This set by Jason Isbell and Sadler Vaden at KEXP is fantastic. If you’re looking for something more upbeat to do your Sunday chores to, these Classic House Grooves will keep you moving. Enjoy!

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Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.



Peace & Love,